I was in the supermarket today when genius struck.

As I watched the Kindly Russian Deli Girl behind the counter slice my liverwurst (that’s right, I like liverwurst), she eyeballed what appeared to be roughly a half pound of meat as per my order.  Then, she carried the liverwurst over to the scale and weighed it, realized she was a slice short, brought the liverwurst back to the slicer to add one more slice, then finally put the meat on the scale once again.

A lightning bolt of awesome struck my head. 

“You know what would be a great invention?” I asked.

“Huh?” retorted the Kindly Russian Deli Girl.

“If they took the scale and put it under the slicer,” I continued, undeterred, “That way, you’d know exactly what it weighed as you went and would save yourself the two trips.”

“Uh huh,” nodded the Kindly Russian Deli Girl.

“Feel free to pass that idea on to your superiors!”

As the Kindly Russian Deli Girl smiled politely and put a little giddyup in her liverwurst-bagging to get rid of me, I realized – this is a REALLY good idea.  Like, I could patent this shit and make some goddamn money off it.

But then another lightning bolt hit me – I’m an incredibly lazy man.  So I’ll just post the story on my blog and wait for someone to steal it.  You’re welcome, Mr. Shaw’s.